I saw the lady with the scarf-bun again and was able to take a good look - no pins visible!So I decided to try it myself today (keep in mind that while my hair is thick it's now only slightly past APL length). I took a really long scarf, folded it in half and made a loop over my wrist; gathered my hair in the other hand on the top of my head and then through the loop from the scarf and started wrapping it. Since I run out of hair before fabric, I just pulled the ends a bit tighter and then pushed them "under" and I didn't need any pins. The result is a very comfy and surprisingly stable bun. It starts slightly in the nape area, but that always happens for me, no matter how I start the base or secure it. Wouldn't have thought so before trying it myself, but since I know that the lady has fine hair, I now believe that it is possible that she doesn't need to secure it further than that. However, I also don't think that the same would work on your hair, the weight would likely cause it to slide.
I tried a few times to see if I could recreate something like that but with no luck :(Maybe it has something to do with the texture of the scarf? It seems like some fabrics are just better at creating hold without damaging the hair. But I think one of the principles of the paranda is that you should run out of hair, so you provide the stability and hold with the paranda. Most hair is after all, very slippery....Or maybe it has something to do with cowlicks or directions of hair growth? I always really struggle with updos with too much "lift". Although my hair doesn't look to have a lot of that going, it still grows firmly *down* and any attempt to put something up higher results in instability and discomfort.And just a personal pout: It seems like people with fine hair just generally have an easier time creating updos than coarsies like me (Can you tell I'm feeling a little sorry for myself? lol)