Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Dieting, hair and me

I’ve been debating whether I should be putting this in writing and on my blog or not. On one hand, I feel exposed and that it’s deeply personal. On the other hand, it’s a part of my life (And of concern to the topic of my blog: My hair) and I have a strong dislike against those blogs where women go on about how they “Eat anything they want to!” and posts pictures of their food, lots of snacks and candy and still weigh less than my favourite boots.

I don’t want to promote such a fake view of reality.

The reality is that I weigh 64 kg.
The reality is that I have a very narrow window where I like my body: 54-56 kg.
Below that and I have bones poking out and look unhealthy.
Above that and my fat starts piling up between my hips and upper thighs and I absolutely hate my body.

So yes, I hate my body. I have gained 10 kg in the less than two years I have known hubby. Talk about relationship-gut!

I have tried cutting out candy and snacks, but forbidding them makes them even more tempting! I love cooking, I love food and I love eating.

So, without controlling my diet I eat more than I can burn. It doesn’t help that hubby and I want to snuggle up on the couch with movies and snacks.
And it doesn’t help that this is what I feel about going to the gym at the moment:

But whenever I try to go on a diet, all the “forbidden” food is tempting me.

Strangely when I fast (About once a year) I’m doing really well. Maybe it’s because I have systemised my day and organised what I can eat and when? So whenever I feel cranky or hungry, I know I have so-and-so long until the next allowed meal or drink.

Maybe that’s the way to go? Calculate a diet with the exact number of calories and what foods and when I can eat?

I will have to pay attention to how much protein I get on the diet then. About 3 years ago I went through a really, really stressful year and I lost a lot of hair without noticing. I must have lost a just few extra hairs each day since I didn’t notice it, but it all adds up. I can clearly see the regrowth today. It adds up to about the thickness of a finger, so it’s quite a lot!

Of course this makes me very paranoid of any diet changes. Protein shakes aren’t a lot of extra calories for a lot of protein if you just use low fat milk. I really should incorporate that in a diet to make sure.

I’m really tired of hating my body. I should get myself together to do something about it…

To be continued!


  1. The biggest thing about dieting is NOT saying 'I can't eat that'. The key is moderation.

    Once you get to a certain age, the pounds add up simply because your metabolism starts to slow down. So, what it took to lose weight is now what you do to maintain weight.

    Hair loss you noticed was probably due to stress, not weight loss--I lost a ton of hair to mega stress once, and the stress is what causes hair shed. Thankfully that hair loss grows back.

    You won't lose hair if you diet intelligently. First, find what your RDI is--regular dietary intake. There are many sites for that. This is what your body requires to function. From there, you can base your caloric intake and count calories. I've just uploaded a program to my smartphone to keep track of what I eat when I'm traveling.

    It's amazing that you burn calories at the computer, driving and sleeping!!! Who knew? So, the key is finding out a good caloric intake--I can't go to 1500--I find I get major headaches. I was told by 2 medical professionals that for an active lifestyle, I'd need 1700. That seems to be working for me, but I'm shedding a pound a MONTH. Soooo depressing, but I didn't gain the weight over night--I gained it over 10+ years.

    I actually thought you'd lose weight--that photo of you in the lovely blue top, you looked much trimmer to me. But, I know how you feel--it's how you FEEL that is the bigger issue.

    Don't give up!!! And don't be hard on yourself.

  2. The sailor moon images made me laugh XD

  3. I can totally follow you in being unhappy with your own weight! I hate that :( but food is so yummy and Im so lazy :(