Wednesday 30 November 2011

100 things to try with your hair before you die

(A lot of these have a certain “rite of passage” status among longhairs!)
Edit: Added Rita’s, Teufelchen's and Mandy's awesome entries to the list!   
    1. Accidentally whacking someone in the face with your braid
    2. Accidentally whacking yourself in the face with your braid
    3. Arguing that you’re definitely not a product junkie. No, you’re not!
    4. Avoiding severe sunburn on your scalp by wearing a scarf (And then feeling smugness the next day than no one else was as clever as you)
    5. Being asked how much money you spend on shampoo (With the pre-set assumption that it is a lot)
    6. Being asked how much time your spend on your hair (With the pre-set assumption that it is a lot)
    7. Being called selfish, because you don't show the beauty of your hair and "hiding" it in a bun instead
    8. Being really, really tempted by a crazy colour or cut, but deciding against it because you like your hair just the way it is
    9. Being told that cutting your hair makes it grow faster
    10. Being told that you are too fat/tall/short/skinny/pale/tan or in general have the wrong shape or face for the length of hair you have
    11. Being told that you are too old for the length of hair you have
    12. Biting back a snarky reply to “How do you wash it?” or something similar
    13. Biting your lip not to laugh at how long other people take to do their hair in the morning
    14. Building a failsafe routine that you can always return to if things go wrong
    15. Checking out at the supermarket with more hair products than actual food in your cart
    16. Discovering the wonder of S&D
    17. Doing something completely weird to promote hair growth or health. Then later think back to it and wonder what the hell you were thinking?
    18. Enable someone with a great product
    19. Experience an amusing hair-mishap and sharing it on your favourite forum
    20. Experiencing someone making a mean comment about you being selfish and not “thinking about the poor children with cancer who needs a LoL wig made from your hair” and not losing your cool or sinking to their level
    21. Experiencing someone making a mean comment about your long hair and not losing your cool or sinking to their level
    22. Feeling a deep satisfaction that you made the most you could out of your hair!
    23. Feeling trendy because the IT-thing in hair at the time is whatever messy thing you happen to have whipped your hair up in that day
    24. Finding an oil your hair really loves
    25. Finding hair in the weirdest, most inappropriate body parts and thinking "How the hell did it get there?"
    26. Finding someone who will cut your hair exactly the way you want and nothing more
    27. Getting your hair caught under your significant other
    28. Growing your hair longer than you actually like and then decide “Nah, I like it better when it’s just a bit shorter”
    29. Hair-typing people around you in a bored moment
    30. Having been too eager with an awesome new treatment and pissing your hair off
    31. Having the ends of your hair tickle a certain body part and think [insert name of that bug you hate here]!
    32. Having your hair pulled by your armpit
    33. Having your hair pulled by your elbow
    34. Having your hair pulled by your knee
    35. Having your love-making interrupted by “Ow! My hair!”
    36. Having your pet play with your hair
    37. Holding something completely non hair-related in your hands and thinking “Hm, maybe I could use this in my hair somehow?”
    38. Impressing someone by whipping your hair up in a bun in 37 seconds flat
    39. Inspiring someone else to buy the exact same hair tool as you
    40. Inspiring someone else to grow their hair
    41. Letting your hair go completely and entirely greasy from its natural sebum
    42. Looking back at old hairstyles and laugh
    43. Making someone actually want to eat your hair because of the delicious-smelling treatment you made
    44. Making someone think you cut your hair while it’s in reality hidden safely under a wig or updo
    45. Making someone think you made some sort of delicious food when you cook up a new hair treatment in the kitchen
    46. Matching your entire outfit to whatever tool you’re wearing in your hair that day
    47. Overhearing a sweet and spontaneous comment about your hair from a child
    48. Owning a cute scarf or tichel that you can hide even the messiest hair-day under
    49. Owning a piece of hair jewellery that costs more than your entire outfit
    50. Owning a wig, a wig piece or a funky-coloured clip in
    51. Perfecting a single up do that you can always do no matter what
    52. Picking the meatiest meal on the menu and then arguing “My hair needs protein!”
    53. Picking up a food item from the kitchen and taking it into the bathroom to spoil your hair with
    54. Reaching your length goal and going “Hm, maybe just a little longer…?”
    55. Realising that sometimes, mean comments really do come from jealousy
    56. Realizing that your bun makes for a good shock absorber
    57. Realising you outgrew someone you considered a hair idol
    58. Receiving a mean comment for your hair and giving a snappy comeback
    59. Regretting a cut
    60. Rinsing your hair with diluted ACV
    61. Rinsing your hair with some strange brew with fruit juice or tea or the like
    62. Rolling your eyes at an advertisement when you know hair doesn’t actually work that way
    63. Rolling your eyes at hair advice when you know hair doesn’t actually work that way
    64. Rolling your eyes at someone using the term “dead ends”
    65. Rolling your eyes at someone who just doesn’t understand that having short hair is just not the same as having long hair you can put up
    66. Seeing the cashier/customer service at the store give you funny looks when they see you with several bottles of conditioner but no shampoo to match
    67. Seen flat-ironed and hair sprayed hair up close and knowing it’s really not pretty or healthy at all
    68. Sharing a sweet comment someone made about your hair with the people on your favourite forum
    69. Squealing in delight over a brand new hair toy
    70. Tickling your significant other with your hair
    71. Trying CO
    72. Trying WO
    73. Using the argument “It’s for my hair!” and getting it your way!
    74. Using the argument “It’s for my hair!” in any way
    75. Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing that your hair is caught under something. You then tell your SO to get off your hair and then you realize it's actually caught under your back instead
    76. Waking up in the middle of the night and thinking that the soft, furry thing caught between the mattress and the headboard is a dead rodent when it is actually your hair
    77. Washing with an herb
    78. Wearing braided pigtails just because you can. And no, you’re not too old!      
Hmm, I’m quite a few short here. Any help, guys?

12 comments:

  1. Some I've already done:

    - Finding hair in the weirdest, most innapropriate body parts and thinking "how the hell did it got there?"

    (Besides that obvious place, I once got a strand inside a sock, I spent the whole day thinking I had a loose seam around my pinky toe, only to realize later that it was a hair strand! It left a crease on my finger for hours and hurt like hell.)

    -Having your hair pulled by your armpit.
    - Having your hair pulled by your elbow.
    - Having your hair pulled by your knee (I can't wait to have this one happen to me- Am I a weirdo? xD)
    - Having the ends of your hair tickle a certain body part and think [insert name of that bug you hate here]!

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  2. Muahahah, Rita those are great! :D

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  3. * My cat tries to climb on my hair when I'm braiding it.
    * BUT! she has acknowleged that she cannot step on my hair when walking around my bed (outch!) so she jumps over my head to avoid it (now I just have to teach her not to walk over my back and bum)
    Do these count too? =D

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  4. - Making someone actually want to eat your hair because of the delicious-smelling treatment you made.

    (Yes, my DBF tried that when I made a treatment that had lots of honey in it, lol)

    - Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing that your hair is caught under something. You then tell your SO to get off your hair and then you realize it's actually caught under your back instead.

    - Waking up in the middle of the night and thinking that the soft, furry thing caught between the mattress and the headboard is a dead rodent when it is actually your hair.

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  5. Haha Mandy the honey story is hilarious! I read it out loud to hubby and he said “See? It’s not just me!” (Although he sticks with just *sniffing* it a lot)

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  6. LOL! My DBF's reaction by far one of the strangest, but also cutest things he has ever done.

    Oh, another one!

    - Realizing that your bun makes for a good shock absorber.

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  7. Oh, I just thought of another one!

    - Seeing the cashier/customer service at the store give you funny looks when they see you with several bottles of conditioner but no shampoo to match.

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  8. getting called selfish, because you don't show the beauty of your hair and "hiding" it in a bun instead. *lol*

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  9. Added! And lol, what a weird thing to tell someone…?

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  10. Well I got it from a hairdresser, when I bought there a conditioner. :) But still I found it too funny.

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  11. * Be called "cousin itt" by someone when walking.
    * Accidentally lose a bun and hear " Ooooow it's super long !!"
    * Getting a strand cut when walking in the street by a hair-psycho (happened to my mother when she was at classic.. euuuw)
    *

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